How to: start a conversation

Imagine you're in a situation where you don't know anybody. It's scary!

You have two options:

1. Remain in this situation, or run away! (I'm joking)

2. Get to know someone!

Where to start...

There are a few topics where everyone has an opinion, the weather being one of them.

You could also talk about the event that you are at, ask how their day is going or what their commute was like to get to the venue.

We've been enjoying some lovely weather recently, haven't we?

You could use questions such as:

• "We've been enjoying some lovely weather recently, haven't we?"

• "The first speaker was very interesting, wasn't she?"

• "The traffic was terrible this morning, wasn't it?"

Note that these questions make use of question tags. These are when we turn a statement into a question by using the words within the sentence at the end, but switched around.

• "We have been..." "...haven't we?"

• "the speaker was..." "...wasn't she?"

• "The traffic was..." "...wasn't it?"

The question tag encourages a response from the person you are talking to, thus starting a conversation.

• "I had an early start to get here on time. How about you?"

• "I work in the paper industry. How about you?"

• "I thought the food on the buffet was good. How about you?"

"How about you?" encourages a response from the person you are talking to, rather than simply making a statement.

I thought the food on the buffet was good. How about you?

Topics to stay away from:

• Politics can be very controversial and could lead to a heated discussion.

• Religion can easily lead into politics, so that is also best avoided.

• Money or personal finance can make people feel uncomfortable.

• Gossip can make you seem untrustworthy.

How to keep the conversation going

You have been successful in starting a conversation with a stranger and exchanged a few words, well done!

Now, how do you keep the conversation going so that it doesn't become awkward?

You can build on what they have just said using sentences such as:

• "That sounds interesting! How did you get into that?"

• "I had a similar thing happen to me once..."

• "I love running too! I'm new to this area, do you know of any good routes?"

• "I'm always looking for new recipe ideas. Where did you find the curry recipe you mentioned?"

Have you been on any trips recently?

If conversation has become stuck then travel is always a good topic:

• "Have you been on any trips recently?"

• "Do you usually take a holiday in the summer?"

• "Do you like to travel and visit places at the weekends?"

Remember: listening is as important, perhaps even more important, than speaking during a conversation. Listen to what the other person is saying because from this you can build on the conversation.

Of course we do not want to spend all our time talking to a stranger, so...

How do we politely leave the conversation?

Try using phrases like:

• "I should go and check on my friend now. It was great to talk to you."

• "I need to get going now, but it was great to meet you."

• "I've just seen my boss over there and I need to ask her something, it was great to speak to you."

If you use the last phrase make sure you go and speak to your boss!

Talk to me about conversational English practice.

Chantal followed an English speaking course before her holiday to Australia and this is what she had to say:

“Very happy that I made the choice to learn to speak better English with Joanne.

My self-confidence has improved as a result. Joanne is very friendly and brought up really nice topics. Recommended."